jane_and.the_dragon

 
joined: 2014-04-15
Worry about your character, not your reputation. Your character is who you are, your reputation is who people think you are. ht
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LOOK IN THE MIRROR

     I was talking to a friend of mine and we got on the subject of people accusing you of being or doing things you not only would never do you would never think of doing.   My mom used to say if someone accuses you of doing something you would not even think of doing it is because they themselves have been doing it.   I told my friend a story that happened about 8 years ago.   I was one of the members of the resident councle in my neighborhood.   One of the councle's jobs was to run the community hall.   After 3 times of the councle having to go into the toy closet and completely resort all the game parts out because the children had been just throwing them into the room without putting them away properly we desided to make a rule that any child wanting a game would need to have an adult with them when they went to get it.  Each child could have only one game out at a time.   If they wanted another one they would need to bring back the one they had before to get another one.

     I was working the computer lab one night I heard a rucus in the main hall area so I went to check it out.  There were 7 little children in the toy closet with no adult in attendance.  I spoke to the oldest one and asked him what they were doing in there without an adult.   He said Miss Kathy had told him he could get a ball.   I said ok but you know the rule NO KIDS IN THE TOY CLOSET WITHOUT AND ADULT! so why did you not come get me if Kathy was not coming in with you?   I thought it was a valid question given the fact the rule was posted and had been told to all the children.   A little girl about 8 years old that I had never seen before said to me,"You just do not want us in here cause we are black".   I looked at her and siad NO I do not want you in here because you are rude and we have rules.   I then turned to another little girl that has know me her whole life and I said, "Weesie you have know me your whole life,  am I predgiest? "  She said, " No Miss Jane you treat all kids the same."   I looked back to the little girl that had made the accusation and I said, " See and that is from someone that has know me her whole life.   It is you hun that is making the assumptions based on skin color not I."   Little did that child know I myself have some black blood  along with souix and german in me.   She thought because my skin was white I was automaticly predgiest.   I wonder if she got the idea everyone with white skin is predgist from her parents.   If she did they all need to look in the mirror because it is them not I that is predgist.  

     So many times people will make assumptions about other people motives for doing something based on their own feelings and actions.   I am not one of these people.   I will straight up ask someone why they do something if I do not think they were right to do it.   Many times you will find out you are way off base if you ask and get the real reasoning behind any given action.   If you do get a different answer then what you expected you should look in a mirror because you are the one that thought what you accused someone else of thinking or doing.

     My brother one time got into a big fight with our sister and neice over what he thought they meant which was not at all what they said.   When he quoted his feelings to me as if someone had said it, I demanded to know who said what he had just said to me.   At that point he admitted NO ONE had actuslly said those words.  At that point I said wait a minute, IF NO ONE ACTUALLY SAID THOSE WORDS WHY ARE YOU GETTING MAD ABOUT THOSE WORDS?   I said,  YOU ARE THE ONE THAT HAD THAT THOUGHT AND YOU ARE TRYING TO PROJECT IT ONTO SOMEONE ELSE THAT NEVER EVEN THOUGHT THAT.   He tried to convince me he was right he said you know how you just know what someone means.   I said no i do not as I listen to what people say not what I may think they mean.   If they do not actually say it I do not get mad about it.   He went on to say if I said if you go out side you will get wet you will know it is raining.   I said not neccessacerally if you say if you go out side you will get wet there could be someone out there with a hose spraying everyone that comes out the door.   So then he says if I say it is raining you will know if you go out side you will get wet.   I said not neccessacerally if I go outside on a covered porch I am still outside but sense I am under the roof I am still not getting wet.   I told him you need to listen to what is said not not read things into it out of your mind as your read in will most often be wrong.   He needed to look in the mirror because it was him that had the bad thought about his daughter not our sister and neice. 

     Always remember when making judgements about others look in the mirror first.